Random Advice For Your Everday Life! (maybe...)
You'll most likely be EXTREMELY confused by this information...but oh well...my friend Isa made up a lot of it...but I helped too!

MOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
1. Hi! Think happy thoughts!
2. Smile
3. Don't worry
4. Be happy now (do do do do do do do do do do do do)
5. Do your homework!
6. Get an A.
7. Don't be afraid
8. Ask more questions
9. Get more sleep or just sleep for once!
10. Eat!! But not too much!!
11. Be so nice it scares you, but not too nice!!
12. 1 hour of your day should be devoted to:
a) starring off into space
b) wandering aimlessly
c) singing random songs
13. Look up what your name means
14. Drink 7 glasses of water a day
15. Learn how to polka dance
16. Draw a picture of yourself with your eyes closed
17. Call an old friend
18. Take yoga lessons
19. Climb Mt. Everest (just kidding)!
20. Get a pet Water Buffalo or Kangaroo
21. Say Thank you and Please
22. Buy a Giga pet
23. Go up to someone and tell them how nice they are.
24. Go bungee jumping.
25. figure this really easy algebra problem out:
6x + 24x + 12x
26. Go live in the wilderness for a week, without
anything but a knife, blanket and yourself (you don't
have to be fully clothed).
27. Don't forget the answer to all your questions is
42 or 6 times 9.
28. Chase a squirrel. he he he
29. Be afraid be very afraid! he he he
30. Rip up a Beauty magazine, because they only make
you feel ugly!
31. Have a conversation with your pet fish, Fluffy.
32. Make a photo album of really stupid, random and
just plain scary pictures.
33. Buy yourself roses just to feel special.
34. Learn how to talk to your pets, all 100 of them.
35. Make up a language for yourself and use it when
you want to be heard but not get into trouble.
36. Dig a bomb shelter in you back yard.
37. Laugh
38. Run through any water sprinkler you find, even if
its not yours.
39. Nickname yourself.
40. Ban cliques at your school.
41. Don't drink any caffeine for a week.
42. Talk to yourself when ever you can.
43. Speak your mind when it comes to racism, sexism,
homophobia or anything that makes you tic.
44. Give up those really bad habits such as, being
bitchy, being slutty, smoking, drinking or constantly
swearing.
45. Use Shakespeare whenever you can
46. Find out your blood type
47. Ignore the people you know that don't like you.
48. Look people in the eye when you talk to them.
49. Take a CPR class.
50. laugh at yourself
51. Learn how to speak in sign language.
52. Go feed your fish, Fluffy
53. Don't care if you're apathetic
54. Find time to spend with a friend.
55. Laugh when ever you can.
56. Be a couch potato!
57. Live la vida loca!
58. give away old clothes to the Good Will.
59. Never underestimate the power of a group of dumb
people
60. Try to convince your mother or father that in
fact, you Really Are an alien from outer space.
62. When taking an algebra test, remember that 1x +1x
= 2x!
63. When driving through a gate, always check to see
if it is open.
64. Don't light fireworks in your basement.
65. Don't drink gape juice with a whit t-shirt on.
66. If you are not living, you are dead(This may not
apply to you)
67. don't try to pierce your belly button or any part
of you body in the dark.
68. Cats and fish don't mix
69. don't try to impress your girlfriend by sticking
your whole fist in your mouth at one time.
70. Sometimes if you try hard enough you can be two
people while doing to things and being at two
different places at the same time.
71. If your stressed out and need a vacation, don't
go to New York!!! D-U-H ...duh
72. The #3 does not come after #4.
73. On line relationships don't usually work out (the
guys are usually hairy stalkers).
74. Don't super glue any part of you body to
anything.
75. never trust your teddy bear with your deepest
secrets.
76. Your brothers and sisters will always be a pain
in the butt even though you love them.
77. Parents will always worry about you when you go
out with that guy who has a Mohawk and wears lots of
chains.
78. Always write down your dreams
79. Never do something again if you got in trouble
that first time.
80. Sometimes your parents actually know what is
going on in your life.
81. Trying to dress, eat, finish your homework and
talking on the phone usually doesn't work.
52. Kittens will always be cute.
83. Don't trust you siblings with you diary.
84. Don't stick marbles up your nose, it's not a good
thing.
85. If you have a question, ask.
86. Telling a woman, "That dress makes you look fat"
will get you hurt, literally.
87. If every muscle in your body hurts and you can't
get out of bed, it usually means you might be just a
LITTLE sick, or you got beat up last night.
88. Don't stand in back of a mad horse.
89. Never trust a vampire if they tell you they're
your friend...it's not worth it.
90. Buy your pet fish, fluffy, a Xmas gift.
91. Give someone a hug
92. Monkeys will always be curious
93. Never eat yellow snow
94. Don't think its impossible to be able to run into
a parked car, it has been done.
95. Always remember to see a doctor if you think you
have elephantitus.
96. Wear sunscreen.
97. Don't play hockey without a stick.
98. If you can't remember how to got tied up, you
need a social life.
99. Never stick your finger in an electric socket
100. If all that's left to eat is twinkies, nuclear
war happened last night.
101. NEVER underestimate the power of duct tape.
102. Stop sending those really annoying chain
letters.
103. Bark at anyone who comes your way.
104. Anyone who has a problem with you barking at
people, are just plain weird.
105. If you are a girl, try using the MENS bathroom
when there is a big line in the WOMENS.
106. If you ever find a monkey that answers to the
name, Dunkin, call 1-800-FREE-MONKEY.
107. Always remember to pet your pet fish, fluffy!
108. When asked if you want some weed, just say
POOF!!!!!
109. Never microwave Twinkes or Hamsters.
110. Never trust little fury animals who say they are
your friends.
111. Always remember to look both ways before
crossing.
112. don't believe everything you read.
113. Always question everything.
114. Christina is not a Genie!!!!
115. If someone offers you mint, take it... you
probably need it.
116. If you have the opportunity to go to some far
off country, take it.
117. That guy that you call your boyfriend online is
really a 50 year old pervert.
118. Never put yourself down.
119. Don't let things go to your head.
120. Love at first site?.....whatever.
121. Never trust a senior on your first day of high
school.
122. Always read your horoscope.
123. At least once a day, laugh so hard that it
hurts.
124. Tell yourself that you are a dork because you
know you are.
125. Give your mom a hug.

ARK!!!!!!!!!

126. Never forget your birth date, it comes in handy
when filling out forms.
127. Spiders are icky.
128. Leave your computer for once, it won't blow up
if you leave it...really.
129. Spend some quality time with your pet fish,
fluffy...I think he some things to say.
130. When in doubt, forget about it.
131. If you know the answer to a question, don't ask
it.
132. Don't be a butt-hole.
133. Eat something good for you...you know, something
that looks eatable.
134. Write a letter to yourself.
135. Check your e-mail today.
136. Believe it or not, your dog is not your best
friend.
137. If someone tells you that you are weird, tell
them thank you!
138. Life sucks sometimes, have some M&M.
139. Don't count on life to go the way you planned it
to be, cause it will never turn out that way.
140. Money does not bring you happiness, your friends
do.
141. Buy your pet fish, fluffy, a new friend.
142. Wear more pink.
143. Don't trust goats.
144. Don't trust anyone with a hammer.
145. It's not a good thing if your stuffed animals
start talking to you.
146. You are in trouble if your computer starts
calling you or answering your phone calls.
147. You need a life if you go to your pet fish,
fluffy, for advice.
148. Speak in rhyming cuplets
149. Always turn to bribery when you really want
something.
150. Bark at people, It gives you freedom.
151. When stalking someone remember to feed their dog
pudding and goldfish crackers.
152. Do the chicken dance!
153. Eating 400 mints at the same time is not a good
idea.
154. Don't eat fuzzy green cheese.
155. Don't playfully say that something is gay and
also say that you have nothing against homosexuality.
156. Don't say that life sucks...do something about
it.
157. Never feed your animals chocolate.
158. Don't ever starve yourself to lose weight.
159. Don't feed your pet fish, fluffy, 10 times a
day.
160. Make sure you Smile when someone says something
evil to you.
161. Cigarettes Kill!!  (umm...Isa...about this one...lol)
162. Don not trust someone with a lighter who is
going “Eeee....FIRE FIRE! FIRE!!"
163. Buy that self help book. After all, your a
great person, you're special and doggone it, people
like you!
164. Do not drink anything with a skull on it.
165. Do not drink anything that smells funny.
166. Do not except ride from men who way more than
two hundred pounds and drive pick up trucks.
167. Cell phones really ARE useful sometimes.
168. Have respect for your elders.
169. Make sure you know your urges and then follow
them.
170. Make sure to wipe.
171. Know the rules then break them.
172. If you ever find yourself standing on a toilet
know that you are high on pot.
173. Who cares if you are schizophrenic, we are your
friends!
174. If anyone tells you you are retarded ask
them, "What's your excuse?"
175. Don't look constantly into the past, remember
that what you do now matters in your future.
176. Don't try to be anyone but yourself, your cuter
than they are.
177. If you can't do anything the “right way" just be
inventive
178. Don't trust a vampire with a knife and a fork in
his hand.
179. Always remember that laughing is good for you.
180. Why say no when you can say,
“yes!Yes!YES!" (hahaha).
181. Don't go into a store that says adult
books....These kind of books aren't the kind that make
you smarter.
182. Fire is fun and hot, but remember that you are
too.
183. When you find yourself upset and upset just
smile and say, “Who Cares??Baby, its all good!!!"
184. The sexiest thing is to be yourself (unless your
name is Bill Clinton).
185. Stereotypes are a way of categorizing
differences, People should ignore these, they make you
feel bad about who you are.
186. Before you are truthful to everyone, make sure
you are truthful to yourself.
187. When you are really mad, take it out on a
pillow, but not anything that is living.
188. Clean out your pet fish Fluffy's bowl, he will
thank you for it.
189. Always remember, drugs are not needed to get
high, just being yourself with your friends is good
enough.
190. Don't take everything so seriously all the time,
relax for once, take a break.
191. Always carry around a pocket knife, you never
know when you will need it.
192. Don't judge people by the first impression.
193. take a moment in your day and think about what
it would be like if you were a rock in the middle of
the desert....scary!!!
194. Always remember that things are not impossible,
people make them impossible by not trying hard enough.
195. Do what ever makes you feel good about yourself,
even if it is dancing around your house in your
underwear.
196. Never trust strangers who say they will give you
candy if you get in the car with them.
197. Always remember to go shopping for yourself, not
for others.
198. Remember that smoking does not make you look
glamorous. (I love all your anit-smoking advice :P)
199. Never trust your deepest secrets with some one
who told you someone else's deepest secrets.
200. Never over use the word “FRIEND" because not all
of them are really your friends.
201. If you ever get pulled over by a police officer
don't ever ask him if he is going to check the trunk.
202. You should get help if you are dreaming that
M&M's are trying to eat you because you are a sheep
who is afraid of clowns.
203. You are not a vampire if you tell yourself in
the mirror that you are going to eat someone tonight.
204. Always remember to use your watch if you have
one.
205. Don't deny doing things that you weren't even
accused of doing yet.
206. Always remember that second hand smoke kills. (Again..lol..and what about first-hand smoke? But it doesn't matter if we die I guess :P)
207. Never write a 7 page long list of random things
when you could be frolicking down the street.
208. Pokemon are not real.... just keep telling
yourself that.
209. Never punish someone for hitting by hitting
them.
210. I think your pet rock needs some attention.
211. Always remember the the # for 911 is 911.
212. Compliment three people everyday. It will make
you feel good about yourself.
213. Find out what the colors of the rainbow mean.
214. When eating M&M's make sure you eat them before
they eat you.
215. make sure that you have some sort of morals and
then follow them.
216. If you are confused, try to not unconfuse
yourself, it just makes matters worse.
217. Always remember that the pinkness will rule the
world one day, maybe not today or tomorrow the day
after that or the day after that, but one day.
218. If it is before 10:00 in the morning and you
have had 3 cups of coffee already, I think you need to
cut back on the caffeine a little. (NEVER!!!!!!!!!!)
219. When you are in a situation where you have to
choose between two people, don't choose either they
are not your friends if they are making you choose.
220. Don't trust little fury cartoon character
characters who say they would really like to have you
for lunch.
221. Always remember that talking is good for you.
222. Don't be afraid of the invisible “it" that
follows you around all day.
223. If you are really bored, write a poem about how
bored you are.
224. Screaming randomly keeps you awake and those
around you.
225. Don't be afraid to express yourself.
226. Don't stick books down your pants.
227. Don't listen to the Pikacho, it doesn't know
either.
228. Remember that for the most part giving is better
than receiving.
229. If you are bored, sing a song to yourself that
you just made up.
230. Always be nice to the people that you don't want
to piss off.
231. Never try to threaten someone with a spoon.
232. Always wear a helmet if you decide to ride down
a hill that is at a 90 degree angle.
233. Pom poms are cool.
234. Always remember that no means NO!!!!
235. Be proud of who you are.
236. Don't be ashamed if you are gay or bi.
237. If you are a girl, you should own at least one
tie (not one you stoll from your boyfriend), just
because you can!
238. Remember that it is always better to give than
recieve (but always accept the gifts)
239. Talk to the invisible “it" that follows you
around all day.
240. Alwasy believe in miracles.
241. Alwasy believe in angels, you never know when
you will need them.
242. Take as many pictures as you can in life, so
that your children or family have something to hold on
to when you die or you have something to hold on to
when they die.
243. Don't trust talking cats.
244. You know you like *NSYNC, so give in and buy
there CD.
245. Never wallow in self pitty.
246. Sticky notes are cool.
247. Everyone should hail Frank T. Dugford! Hail
Frank T. Dugford!!!!!
248. You can read all the self help books in the
world but it is up to you to change your life.
249. Does anyone see the irony in payong a shipping
charge for something free? Maybe its just me
250. Always remember that it is ok to stare at a
lava lamp for long periods of time and never
experience a moment of boredom.